nothing says city like 東京

2°C

yamanakako， japan | 山中湖 ，日本

previously, in 2011, I got

(1) an ang pow in Malaysia

(2) a new job

(3) conferred a new degree

(4) myself in various places with new colleagues for work or leisure

In other news, while coping with the steep learning curve in this new phase of life, I am also in search of the 'work-life balance' that our local pro-family enthusiasts social discourse is droning on about. So it isn't as rosy a picture as all the images have shown, but I do try to do my best, have fun, and find meanings in the things I have to do. Don't you?

never let me go

"I keep thinking about this river somewhere, with the water moving really fast. And these two people in the water, trying to hold onto each other, holding on as hard as they can, but in the end it's just too much. The current's too strong. They've got to let go, drift apart. That's how it is with us. It's a shame, Kath, because we've loved each other all our lives. But in the end, we can't stay together forever."

60.14%

so I voted today

Being in a SMC ward, I was spared the agony of mulling over a buy-1-get-4-free deal that is easily read as an embarrassing local political weapon designed to buttress a single-party domination. And it's kind of like cable TV. I'm happy to pay only for Channel A, but I must pay for a bundle of Channel A and other channels that I will not be watching. Because that's how they are packaged and sold, that's how it rolls. Inflexible bullshit, unhappy consumers.

That's how we roll.

city

planned.

28 years and not counting

to a brand new stage in the life course.

glass

headed north last friday

and enjoyed six eventful days scooting in and between cities, towns and villages in this part of Malaysia:


two more to follow.

late night chat with a friend

"O btw what irks me most is, I'm still getting thinner but no one ever says, good, you're so much healthier [BMI used to be like 30]. Everyone says, omg, you look so much prettier."

anyone moderately familiar with the rigour of composition will not need to be told the story in detail; how he wrote it and it seemed good; read and it seemed vile; corrected and tore up; cut out; put in; was in ecstasy; in despair; had his good nights and bad mornings; snatched at ideas and lost them; saw his book plain before him and it vanished...now cried; now laughed; vacillated between this style and that...and could not decide whether he was the divinest genius or the greatest fool in the world.

Orlando,
Virginia Woolf, [1928] 1998, p.79

Penny: I’m a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to know.

Sheldon: Yes, it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the sun’s apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality.

The Big Bang Theory S1E1

new year

and new vantage points to see Singapore.

I've had the privilege to survey several large cities from above, and this time my emotions flowed in quite exceptional directions as I stood high up in a sky garden resembling a long spaceship resting awkwardly above three shiny hotel buildings to witness the very city I'm born and raised in.

So this, I thought as I gazed at the shimmering lights, is the place where my newly-married parents chose to start our family 32 years ago. And this, I realised, is the city I've grown to appreciate as home despite a nagging string of reservations that stemmed from gripes in fighting to be accepted, to do well, and to live comfortably vis-a-vis its social shortcomings. This, I concluded, is the place I want to contribute to making it better not just for Singaporeans, but also for those who have risked ditching familiarity in their own countries for a shot at improving their lives and those of their families in what currently is a city-ful of locals expressing mixed feelings about their presence.

(I suppose we can throw eggs endlessly at 'foreigners' on internet forums and lament in coffeeshops and taxis about the immigration policy all day, but I'm sure most of us can also discern that migration-related issues, perceived or real, aren't going to benefit from an informal public discourse of hate and blame attribution. Might be better to make 'quit whining and do something' the principal new year resolution and stick to it!)

愿难了。

The one thing puzzling me this morning: Why mourn the loss of something important when all along (a fictional) you were already conscious of how your decisions could lead to such an outcome? I suggest it's more fulfilling to cry over the opportunities you would never have again to rethink your options. Then, move on.

This year I found the cuddliest christmas tree ever.

Happy holidays!

♥

labouring on powerpoint slides for Thursday in a warm night like this, I don't know why I keep thinking that everything could have been easier two years ago. I think the universe has a cruel sense of irony, and tonight I feel it strongest.

we wait.

"Q: Which is worse? Ignorance or apathy?

A: I don't know and I don't care."

So after spinning through a rough week, I rest in knowing I have an empathic family to update and a solid group of understanding individuals I deem friends to ruminate or comiserate with. Call this social support, social network or even social capital. Whatever its name, it certainly restores the requisite sanity for moving on steadily in a speed-obsessed society that can sometimes also be very unforgiving.

Simple comforting words from a friend Joyce: we all try our best, and hope that people understand.